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14 years ago
Sunday, 31 January 2010
Saturday, 30 January 2010
Monday, 25 January 2010
She May Look Like A Woman But She Is All Man..
Ella may look like a woman with her knee high boot's, thick eye lashes, skin tight jean's and other girly thing's, until she burp's!!
Her burp's are so manly and loud that the dead could hear her.
And this is the time for me to tell you about the time she burped and scared a man!!
Ella doesn't care where she is when she burp's she just let's them out, at home, in a cafe, the doctor's she has even burped in the library.
But the best time she did one was in public, she just finished her favourite Mc Donald's combo of Fries and Strawberry milkshake when she did the biggest loudest burp she had ever done and a man who was literally 10 minutes in front of us heard it and jumped round like someone fired a gun!!
Her burps will make any man proud..!!
Another Holiday Another Fall
June 2007
Location: Leysdown Beach, Kent.
It was our first week of our annual family holiday and me and Ella was taking a walk one sunny afternoon on the beach, we started walking towards Warden Bay, chatting away about what to have for dinner and what to wear to the club that night when we realized how far we had walked but carried on anyway.
It was nice the two of us having some alone sister time when we came to a gate which was stuck so we had to find another way around it.
On one side was stinging nettles and on the other side was a nice clear "safe" bit, so Ella took on the nettles while I opted for the "safe" route, little did I know that it was a mistake.
Ella was talking away about what shoe's to wear, when yes you guessed it my foot got stuck in a little rabbit whole and down the ditch I went.
At the bottom of the ditch was a little stream and because i didn't want to make an ass of myself even more I grabbed on to a wooden post but got about five splinter's and grazed my knee's.
Ella had no idea what had happened and while I was half way down the ditch hanging on for dear life to the wooden post and five splinter's in my hand she was still walking along and talking to her self, and when I didn't answer her she looked round to see what I was doing but of course she couldn't see me.
I can still hear her now shouting out my name asking me where I was.
I couldn't help but laugh and then I saw her head then saw she was crying with laughter at the sight of me me in the ditch.
After about ten minute's of Ella on the ground laughing at me she finally helped me out of my little situation and to steady my nerves we finally made it back to safe ground (Mr B's) for a game of bingo.
This is the reason why I drink, this is what happens to me when I'm sober..!!
Three year's on and Ella keep's telling this story like it happened yesterday...
Location: Leysdown Beach, Kent.
It was our first week of our annual family holiday and me and Ella was taking a walk one sunny afternoon on the beach, we started walking towards Warden Bay, chatting away about what to have for dinner and what to wear to the club that night when we realized how far we had walked but carried on anyway.
It was nice the two of us having some alone sister time when we came to a gate which was stuck so we had to find another way around it.
On one side was stinging nettles and on the other side was a nice clear "safe" bit, so Ella took on the nettles while I opted for the "safe" route, little did I know that it was a mistake.
Ella was talking away about what shoe's to wear, when yes you guessed it my foot got stuck in a little rabbit whole and down the ditch I went.
At the bottom of the ditch was a little stream and because i didn't want to make an ass of myself even more I grabbed on to a wooden post but got about five splinter's and grazed my knee's.
Ella had no idea what had happened and while I was half way down the ditch hanging on for dear life to the wooden post and five splinter's in my hand she was still walking along and talking to her self, and when I didn't answer her she looked round to see what I was doing but of course she couldn't see me.
I can still hear her now shouting out my name asking me where I was.
I couldn't help but laugh and then I saw her head then saw she was crying with laughter at the sight of me me in the ditch.
After about ten minute's of Ella on the ground laughing at me she finally helped me out of my little situation and to steady my nerves we finally made it back to safe ground (Mr B's) for a game of bingo.
This is the reason why I drink, this is what happens to me when I'm sober..!!
Three year's on and Ella keep's telling this story like it happened yesterday...
Thursday, 21 January 2010
What Are Friend's For?
Just an update on friendship and how great it is....NOT!!!
Dan (The best friend of 19 year's) asked me to go on cam so he can show me he is eating ben and jerry's ice cream!!
FRIENDSHIP IS BOLLOCK'S THESE DAY'S!!
Dan (The best friend of 19 year's) asked me to go on cam so he can show me he is eating ben and jerry's ice cream!!
FRIENDSHIP IS BOLLOCK'S THESE DAY'S!!
Football
Carlos 'Kukin' Flores told police he was being chased by a ghost when he was stopped for running naked through the street's..!!!
Carlos has admitted to having issues with cocaine, eventually admitted that he had been "engaging with dirty ladies" and that he came up with the ghost line to try and hide the truth from his wife.
All I can say is..chased by ghost's?!? MATE YOUR STILL ON COCAINE..!! YOU IDIOT..!!
Carlos has admitted to having issues with cocaine, eventually admitted that he had been "engaging with dirty ladies" and that he came up with the ghost line to try and hide the truth from his wife.
All I can say is..chased by ghost's?!? MATE YOUR STILL ON COCAINE..!! YOU IDIOT..!!
Wednesday, 20 January 2010
Never Race A 5 Year Old
Year: 2005
Month: Not to sure..!!
Me Ella Danii Carmen and Alithia was outside my school on our way to my parent's evening and we was going to the shop first.
Danii asked me to race her so I did, but the devil child decied to run in a zig-zag and I tought it would be safer to run in the road so I wouldnt get tripped up by Danii or the other way round, but as I ran into the road I tripped myself up and went skidding across the road and nearly got hit by a car.
It hurt so bad that I wanted to cry but when I saw everyone laughing I started to laugh.
My hip didnt!!
My hip got so badly bruised and cut that to this day the cold weather hurts my hip!!
NEVER RACE A 5 YEAR OLD!!
Month: Not to sure..!!
Me Ella Danii Carmen and Alithia was outside my school on our way to my parent's evening and we was going to the shop first.
Danii asked me to race her so I did, but the devil child decied to run in a zig-zag and I tought it would be safer to run in the road so I wouldnt get tripped up by Danii or the other way round, but as I ran into the road I tripped myself up and went skidding across the road and nearly got hit by a car.
It hurt so bad that I wanted to cry but when I saw everyone laughing I started to laugh.
My hip didnt!!
My hip got so badly bruised and cut that to this day the cold weather hurts my hip!!
NEVER RACE A 5 YEAR OLD!!
Tuesday, 19 January 2010
It Was Between Me And The Fence
June 2008:
I was on holiday with my family, (Mum, Dad and little sister Danii) we was on our family holiday where we go every year.
Leysdown, Kent, staying in our much loves Caravan Park.
Me Mum and Danii was off to the shop while my dad stayed beind, our Caravan was in front of the parking area with a fence around it, Mum and Danii took the long way round and Me being Me took the easy way and climbed over the fence but I was wearing Flip-Flop's (Not good for climbing with..!!)
My foot got stuck on something and i flipped right over landing smack on my face.
Mum and Danii laughing was bad enough until I heard my Dad's evil laugh from the Caravan.
What made matter's worse was the fact that the grass had just been cut and i had grass every where, I mean EVERYWHERE..!!
My hair, down my top, my leg's and yes even my teeth!!
The fence also decided that this wasn't enough and also broke my Flip-Flop's and cut all my leg and arm!!
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