To those who hated me ....

You made me a stronger person

Thanks to those who loved me ...

You made my heart bigger

Thanks to those who cared ...

You made me feel important

Thanks to those who worried ...

You let me know you actually cared

Thanks to those who left me ...

You showed me not everything lasts forever

Thanks to those who stayed ...

You show me the true meaning of friends

Thanks to those who entered my life ...

You made who I am today

Riddle

The colour people associate me with is red.
You might show me with a box of chocolate's.
I cab grow big
and i can grow small.
I can be pure
I can be true.
People show me with flower's and hug's and kisses.


I can make you feel wanted or all alone.
I can tear you apart or make you cry.
I am the complete opposite of hate.
What am i??

LOVE!

I'm all alone, with no one to help me and with no where to go, just me and my trusty razor blade!!

untouchable by shannon mclaughlan

Untouchable.

Sand slipping through pale fingers.
Birds soaring like a plane.
Sun baking like an oven.
Sea stretching.

Untouchable.

Fiery horizon rising high.
Paint a picture and feel free.
Find a key and find an answer.
Find one puzzle piece.
and never have peace again.
Treasure the soil in your hand.

Untouchable.

Dance and leap.
Sing and Glide.
Laughing and Smiling.
Leaves falling of a bare tree.
Unmasked becomes the world

Untouchable


As the past begins to fade.
Present times will change.
Evilness still at war.
Light will always shine brighter.
Forgiving is never easy.
But Forgetting is even harder.
Having a home.

Untouchable.

Leaving behind memories.
Leaving the past and present.
Letting go and saying farewell.
To a life that never lasted long.
But i moved on.

I'm Gonna Say This Now....

When you love someone your views on the world change, your believe's change, you realise you want the things in life you never thought you did, like children, a marriage, and a husband who is also your bestfriend.
You realise that after year's of having a cold closed heart, pushing people away and hateing the world and wanting to be alone because you think noone could love someone like you, with a past to be ashamed of, marks on your body to tell a diferent story everytime, to scared to tell that one person the thing's that make you wish you were dead.
You bottle everything up and pray to god that noone will ever find out.
You say to your self day in day out that you are happy walking the world alone, when the truth is, you hate it.
When your out with friend's you see how happy they are with their boyfriend's/girlfriend's and you start to think, "why can they be happy with someone and I can't", "why can they love being in a relationship and I cant, why are they not scared and I am"
 Then you realise it's because you have been hurt in the past that you wont give anyone else a chance.


You know that there is someone you like but it's a bit like high school because you dont know if he like's you, so you tell a friend and she give's you that little push you need to tell him.
But your still scared and you decied not to do it face to face, so there you are, your heart beat is getting faster and faster, palm's are sweaty you stare blankly and his name on the chat bar and freeze.
You can't tell him how you feel, you have never told anyone so why start now?
You write out what you want to say then delete it, you do this another ten time's and in the end you think fuck it, so on the count of five you hit enter.
You see that he is writing back and your scared of his reply, what do you do if he doesn't feel the same? you wont know until you see what he has to say.


You can relax!! He like's you too.
After a while you start to think, for once in my life, I am with someone who I care about and he actually care's about me too.
Then you remind your self that he will soon change his mind about you once he find's out all about your past and hear's the rumour's and you think to your self, " Do I like him that much to tell him my life story for him to judge me and run a mile?"
The answer: YES. Because not only do you like him but deep down you know you love him, and you know he genrally love's you too.


As the week's and month's go by you start slowly letting him in, telling him the thing's that only your bestfriend know's, and then one day you sit there and think, this man know's every seedy little thing about my past and he is still here with me, he hasn't run a mile, he hasn't judged me, he has kept it a secret and most of all he still love's me.


After month's of being so happy and in love you wake up next to him and realise that you have opened your heart to the first man ever. That's the moment when you come to realise that you no longer want to walk the world alone, you want to spend the rest of your life with him, you want to get married and have his children.
You cant imagine your life with out him and it hurt's to even think of a world where he is not there by your side when you need to talk, or someone to just be there with a cuddle and a shoulder to cry on.
You want to be with him until the end, and you can only hope that he feel's the same.


This is how I found the love of my life. I pushed men away because I didn't want to get hurt, I made a promise to my self that I would be fine on my own but in the end I got fed up of being alone. 
I wanted to be loved but most of all I wanted to love someone.


I guess what I'm trying to say is that if you love someone but to scared to tell them, dont be.
If I can do it so can you.


Take a chance, because everyone deserve's to be happy!!

Where The Cybermen Really Live.

  Daniel Day (My bestfriend and now also known as DODSY) came home from uni so I went to see him and to take his mum and sister Aimee to Victoria coach station and decided to play a couple of tourist's.


So there we was on the 44 bus taking random picture's of anything and everything, Pub's, club's those crazy big red buses and even the home of the QVC shopping channel.
We took crazy picture's of each other and our shoe's, yes I know we are strange people but trust me, we don't care..!!


Then Dodsy took a couple of picture's of Battersea Power Station and said...."That's where the Cybermen really work..!!" 
This coming from a 20 year old who is at uni.
I have not laughed so much in my life, so I called my mum to tell her how stupid my bestfriend was, and she told me it was true, so are the Cybermen real?? and do they live in Battersea Power Station??
Of course they don't, I know this You know this but sadly my mum and Dodsy don't!!!

HOW STUPID IS HE??

Promises

Promises are obviously there to be broken!

Rape Of Mind

Pain is the only thing she feel's.

Hurt has become a part of life.

Agony is what he put her through 

and she can't erase that from her mind.

His face remain's in her head

weather she want's it there or not.

His action's tore her apart

and left her with a broken heart.

she may never be able to forget

the hell he put her through

the pain he caused between her thigh's,

that night in that room.

She can't erase him from her mind

even though she know's she hate's him

she can't take away the fear that it will happen once again.

His heartbeat echoes in her head

his cold eye's they pierced her heart

she doesn't want to remember the night

that he tore her body apart.

Because even though it's over 

it's like it's still  happening inside.

That night of pain and crime 

has turned into a rape of mind.